IF YOU’VE had a worse couple of weeks than Donald ‘im-peach not orange’ Trump and Boris ‘dead in a ditch’ Johnson then you know things are bad.

Step forward Manchester United, who are currently serving up footballing mogadon, and Tottenham who seem to be having a collective breakdown.

The Red Devils hit rock bottom then get out their pick-axes and merrily dig deeper. All the while their supporters sing about the past and try not to look at the table.

Ole Gunner Solskjaer is a manager that no other team in the Premier League would want . . . and that is damning to a club of United’s size. That is one big problem, another is Ed Woodward and the Glazer’s have no will or skill to change fortunes on the pitch.

Add that to the fact that there are too many players who are simply not good enough and that’s where United are at. Cracks have been papered over foundations that are fast crumbling to dust. Now even that paper is peeling off.

Even against serial white-flag merchant and United sycophant Steve Bruce who had previously rolled over 21 times against his old club they could not find a way to win this weekend.

To add to the embarrassment this was an opponent that had been pumped 5-0 the weekend before and had not won at home in the league since April.

After just eight games they are 15 points behind leaders and bitter rivals Liverpool. FIFTEEN POINTS. Since Solskjaer was appointed full time manager Jurgen Klopp’s boys have won as many Premier League games (17) as United have taken points.

Things are so bad at Old Trafford supporters are actually talking about relegation! And as stupid as that sounds, next up at Old Trafford are Klopp & Co, and should the Reds win and other results go against them then Manchester United could be in the drop zone.

In the 1-0 defeat at St James’ Park, a squad that has had almost a billion pounds spent on it in the past six years should not be starting with past-it players like Ashley Young and Juan Mata and terrible players like Fred and Andreas Pereira.

Yes they have a few injuries but vast sums are usually spent to combat that. Instead Solskjaer’s flops limped to an 11th successive game without an away win dropping them to 12th place just two points above the bottom three.

Local lad Matty Longstaff hit the winner on his Toon debut and it was the stuff of boyhood dreams as he played alongside his older brother Sean in a midfield that totally dominated the game.

United have huge problems and nothing is easy to the unwilling so it will not get better any time soon.

Spurs are also struggling big time – having only won once in their past six games. That run has seen them dumped out the Carabao Cup by League Two Colchester and suffer a 7-2 home humbling at the hands of Bayern Munich.

The fact there was no reaction to the Munich mauling in a lame 3-0 loss at Brighton is the biggest concern – even more so than the dire personal performances the whole team put in.

Hugo Lloris dropped a clanger in the third minute and also sickeningly dislocated his elbow. When teams are together such a horrible injury would spur a side on to win for their stricken team-mate. This Tottenham side just rolled over. 

Something is wrong at the club. With the players and manager they have this serious slump makes as much sense as mini chocolate treats being called fun-sized bars? What’s the fun in getting less chocolate?

Wolves inflicted a shock 2-0 loss on champions Manchester City which opens up an eight-point gap at the top.

City remind me of Klopp’s Liverpool side of 17/18 when at times they were unplayable but that also made them a bit unstable in defence.

For City’s demolishing of Watford and five-star show against West Ham see Liverpool’s 7-0 spankings of Spartak Moscow and Maribor or putting five past Brighton, Watford and Swansea.

Last season the Reds went too far the other way – being the meanest defence in the land – but this campaign they seem to have found the right balance.

Playing a higher defensive line was a risk, especially with No 1 Alisson injured on the opening day, but Adrian has come in and is already a cult hero with eight wins from eight in the league and shootout hero in the European Super Cup win.

Klopp’s tweak is paying off and a 95th-minute penalty winner against a very good Leicester side made it an incredible 44 games in a row unbeaten at Anfield.

And who have the Reds – 17 straight league wins – got in their next two Prem games? Yep bang-out-of-form pair United and Spurs. If they win those they beat the winning streak record of that sensational title-winning City side. Oh what a time to be alive for a Liverpool fan.

AND finally in Japan Argentina handed victory to England on a plate with Tomas Lavanini’s red card.

The Pumas second rower was sent off after just 17 minutes for a shoulder to the head of Owen Farrell.

It wasn’t a particularly malicious tackle but it was stupid and high and means this World Cup has now seen a record five reds dished out and that’s just in the pool stages.

If brains were leather, poor Lavanini couldn’t saddle a flea.

Tweet @BabsDouglasBP

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