HALLOWEEN came early for some Premier League defences and managers this week.
And we can feel very smug as it’s the same gallery of rogues that have put the willies up us all year.
EVictor Lindelof had a horror show and was a big reason Manchester United suffered a shock loss at Huddersfield. Within 10 minutes of replacing the crocked Phil Jones the Red Devils were 2-0 down and ended up losing 2-1.
The £31million Swede had his blood twisted before Aaron Mooy clipped home and the winner was even more of a personal disaster as he completely misjudged a long ball to allow Laurent Depoitre to run through on goal.
Jose Mourinho looked like he had seen a ghost after and showed just as much backbone, doing what he usually does when things go bad – laying the blame squarely at the feet of his players.
Dejan Lovren obviously watched Match of the Day and thought ‘hold my beer’ as the Liverpool defender was even worse on Sunday as Jurgen Klopp’s mistake-ridden side gifted Tottenham a 4-1 win at Wembley.
The Croat was embarrassingly hauled off after a calamity half hour playing like he had a pumpkin strapped to each foot.
If every Kop fan who hates Lovren was killed, it wouldn’t be murder – it would be an apocalypse!
He was badly at fault for the first two goals, a weak Joel Matip header led to the third and a customary Simon Mignolet clanger saw Spurs score their fourth.
For a club aiming to compete for silverware Mignolet is about as useful as sunglasses to a bloke with one ear.
Team GB Paralympian powerlifter Ali Jawad summed it up perfectly when he tweeted “I swear to God I can defend better than Liverpool and I have no legs #TOTLIV”
Across Stanley Park and Everton were finally spooked enough to get rid of Ronald Koeman – the 5-2 home loss to Arsenal the final straw.
Just three short months ago Evertonians were crowing they had the manager, £150m worth of new talent plus the romantic return of Wayne Rooney to get them into the Champions League places.
Fast forward and the Toffees really are in a sticky patch – already out of the League Cup, bottom of their Europa League group and in the relegation zone.
Also in big trouble is Slaven Bilic who has two games to save his job after West Ham were comfortably beaten 3-0 at home by newly-promoted Brighton – their first away win in the Premier League
The Hammers are level on points with Everton (8) but their superb 3-2 league cup win at high-flying Spurs – having been 2-0 down – is a major step in the right direction and will be a huge confident boost.
MANCHESTER CITY’S Bernardo Silva dodged an unwanted record this week after his tumble to win a penalty against Burnley.
The Portuguese will NOT become the first top-flight player retrospectively charged for diving despite Sean Dyce’s claim he “cheated”.
No Premier League player has yet been hit by a two-match suspension under new rules this season. The wait goes on and my money is still on Ashley ‘frog legs’ Young.
Shaun Miller became the first player in English football to be retrospectively banned last week after winning a penalty for Carlisle against Wycombe in a League Two game.
AND finally it’s not sport related but is too good not to share and anyway you need food for energy to play sport and chicken is a good source of protein so . . .
KFC have a whopping 1.24 million followers but only follow Victoria Beckham, Emma Bunton, Mel C, Geri Horner, Mel B and six guys called Herb.
It all adds up to 11 herbs and spices in a subtle yet fabulous nod to their famous secret recipe that covers their fried chook. Genius!